#34 Mariette Tappan – Transcript

Louis van der Merwe
Welcome to another episode of Financial Planners, South Africa. Today I have in the studio with me Mariette Tappan. Mariette is Africa’s first Certified Financial transitioners and has been a role model for a lot of financial advisors, myself included. Mariette, thank you so much for joining us today.

Mariette Tappan
Well, it’s a pleasure being here. And I want to firstly congratulate you on being I think this third financial transition is planted in Africa. And I am so excited to grow this community and to be able to find out you know how meaningful this is in your practice. And how do you do it. So well done.

Louis van der Merwe
Well, thank you very much. I’m looking forward to today’s conversation, because I think we can go into a little bit more of the nuts and bolts of what a Certified Financial transition is does and how it came about the work that Susan Bradley has brought to Africa. But before we get there, we’d like to have a little bit of a backstory of how married got into financial services.

Mariette Tappan
There is that old story and I think people that might have heard me talk previously would know that this was going to be the last thing that I do that they say Never say never. And I think it just put a ball down to the the fact that I was in transition at that point in time. You know, I had had my first child. And the partner that we were in that was that I was waiting for the firm passed away. So you know, we videoed, so it was actually my advisor that said to me long, he called me that you will be a very good advisor. And so I went for interviews with a couple of firms. And I’ve been the first of July 1993, I joined liberty in Korea set up and never pursued. And now 30 years later, I would say that the industry served me well. It has skipped me humble and I’ve learned a lot about people. And I think every every financial advisor that I that I’ve worked with or off by colleagues, one of the main reasons I think we joined the industry is because we care about people, you know, we are the people’s people.

Louis van der Merwe
That’s definitely a theme that we’ve heard quite a few of the guests talk about, you know, that caring gene and how it’s important to focus on the human side. So within the financial transitioners Institute, we focus quite a bit on not only the technical side, but also the personal side of financial planning. What was that kind of pulling magnet for you towards that or how did you stumble upon the transitioners Institute to begin with?

Mariette Tappan
I think as financial planners, we tend to have conversations with our clients and we deal with quite a lot of what’s going on in the in the lives. But I think formally we haven’t, you know, upskilled ourselves to really talk to our clients during very difficult situations and you know, mostly clients approaches when there’s when there’s a life change either his death in the family or the sort of retirement or is a sell of a business or these a divorce, or these a new child. And so, in my case, you know, I’ve dealt with five or five people that died, you know, in my client base, and I just thought that they should be, you know, I can do better than then just, you know, going to them with a cabal, you know, you go to be okay with your finances, you know, lead starting that that, because I found that they were not in a good space. And sometimes I didn’t know what to tell them. And I didn’t know how to have the conversation. So I decided that I wanted to be more for my clients. And then I stumbled across the, you know, the organization to the strengths finder Gala. Meeting, which we had. And that was, it was like I found home because it’s really something I think the industry is lacking. Is that extra set of skills, skills that we need, because we we work with people and money, it is the behavior towards money that actually moves them in the direction and may help them make decisions, or might it be good or bad. But, you know, I was adamant that I wanted to have better tools to be able to know to have these conversations and move my clients to make better decisions.

Louis van der Merwe
So Maria, are you saying that, you know, during times when someone might not fit in the normal financial planning process, we need to bring in other tools to work with them. The Mitch Anthony talks about up to 53 different life transitions that someone can go through, but what you’re saying is that these people might not be ready for the normal financial planning process, am I getting that? Right?

Mariette Tappan
That’s true. And as fun as we are, we want to solve, we immediately want to jump in and, you know, talk about the best plan, the best solution, we want to, we want to do the business, you know, that is how, you know, previously, that is our goal, that’s how I learned, you know, you have to write certain amount of cases, you have to do this, you have to you have to perform well, we what we need to or want to have to perform the clients sometimes, you know, is not really to, you know, to do what we want them to do. And sometimes, you know, we don’t listen to what they actually really need. And, you know, we might be instrumental to, you know, that time leading us at the end of the day, because, you know, we don’t really sit down and find out what is actually happening happening in their life. And I think in doing so we do the kinds of justice we do our, our outside our industry, of what we need to do we do it, it’s, you know, we don’t get to the real point. So, yeah, a client might want to do what you need to do for for them. But I think if you take a step back, and really put the client on a pedestal, and, and listen to really what they want and what they don’t want, it’s also a very good way to do make sure that you land up with clients that is in your that is in your fit, you know, especially in the beginning, I think we land up with clients that we actually should not have,

Louis van der Merwe
I want to talk a little bit more about that, you know, rushing into a relationship with a new client, almost wanting to fix something, because we have this tool set. Oh, Mr. Client, you need to invest in this portfolio, we can we can solve that. What’s the antidote? How do we approach this better? To determine a good financial planner and a client fit?

Mariette Tappan
I think you first have to know yourself, well, you know, you have to decide what is your value system? What works for you with Who do you work based and almost identify your ideal clients? You know, might it be through a, an interest that you have? Or might it be the way that you do things? Because we are all different. And I think that is what you know, what makes relationships so unique is that, you know, people, you know, are normally drawn to somebody like you, you know, if you don’t know what, what is most important to you and with who do you want to work in, you will just, you know, take on everybody in anybody. And just later on, you know, having the hardship of relationship doesn’t, you know, that doesn’t work, or, you know, misunderstanding and miscommunication. So, and I think then to really have a format in which you have got your client interview that you speak to them, ask them questions, and really find out if, I mean they stick boxes that we all can fix and you you We see the red flags, we feel them and we still you know, just go ahead and do things which we know at that point in time, I shouldn’t have, I shouldn’t have taken on this fight, or I shouldn’t have been this policy. So I think one has got to really trust your gut feel, but I think know what you knew or what you want, and you really want to work with. And I never used a monetary criteria, because I think, although money is important, I think money always comes with the right actions. So, you know, that’s, that’s my take on that. But I think, especially today, we technology plays such a big role and clients can can find out, you know, really to get walked and do do things themselves, these conversations, needs to be more and in things, and nothing must be a direction, it has been almost an agreement. This is why we have a relationship. And I think, our communication preference to actually address that very, very well. Just by knowing well, if the client wants to detail you not a detail type of person, something is not going to work along the line.

Louis van der Merwe
So that being open and honest and having a conversation around what is the value that you bring? And is that a good match with your clients? In the early days of starting out as a financial advisor? Were you forced to take on clients that you didn’t want to? Or were you in a position where you maybe just, you know, had to take them on? Because you had capacity?

Mariette Tappan
I think when I started in the industry, it was like you were too glad to have a client and you know, and if they say yes, it was a great thing. And the industry has changed a little bit. But in the beginning, I think one is a little bit forced to, to to tack on businesses. It’s also a learning curve. You know, I think you don’t know everything in the beginning. So I think it comes with trial and tribulation. But if I had to do my life over as a financial advisor, I would I would walk I would have walked away from from all business, I actually did that, you know, after two years, I had to clean up my act of I received a needed check of 123 Rand and having to decide, am I staying or the going? Yeah, so you know, anybody that is new in the industry, that’s difficult to survive with the type of remuneration system that we have. And I think if one upskill yourself with more conversational, and the behavior side of finance, new signs of finance, one applies with value and more to pay for a consultancy fee. And not just only a policy fee or a commission, I think we should get rid of that.

Louis van der Merwe
Thank you. How do you position your service to your clients? Now? What what are the words that he used to describe what you do?

Mariette Tappan
You know, I think I do, I do things different in any way to know. So my message is settle in terms of you know, I listened IQ and you know, I do have this extra skill and qualification that that differentiates me from other financial advisors, that I think to be just yourself and to show the interest to the client, that you that you really mean that you’ve got the best interest at heart. And, you know, with the knowledge of the qualifications, because I think people need to know that there is that you need to know your things, you need to be well educated in the technical side. But, you know, I think the value of I think experience, and then also other skills that you equip yourself with, to show that you that you really mean that you want to help them in the best way possible, is how I position myself, I ask a lot of questions. And I don’t necessarily in the beginning, you know, show and show and tell all my qualifications, I get referred to, to clients most of the time. So I think that is also valuable, you know, when one is in the business, so that you can, that people can can tell their friends about you and the experience that they have. That’s different.

Louis van der Merwe
I love how you talk about the technical side, a wealth of experience, because personally, I don’t believe three years is sufficient to pay him, you know, just go out and become a financial planner, but then also the training on the human side. And now we have a few options. You know, we have George kinders registered life planning side we have the transitioners Institute, we have money quotient in America. Do you think there’s sufficient options for someone once they’ve become a Certified Financial Planner to kind of build their skills in the personal side?

Mariette Tappan
Yeah, sure. I do believe so. And I think there’s more and more organizations by you know, even some of the traditional organizations which was in the training material is focusing more and realize that you know, the The way people do business and the way people think about finance and making financial decisions is changing. So yeah, I think these these, these definitely, I think we the traditional Institute is a pioneer in the in, in this particular field of business, and lot more attention is being given. And I’m very glad about that, because I think it is just the right thing to do. I think that, you know, the technical side is important that people make wrong decisions,

Louis van der Merwe
you had almost took a pandemic, for us to realize how important, this isn’t the kind of work that we can bring to our clients, I want you to share a little bit of the actual process that you take a client through that’s gone through a major life transition, what what is it that you do with him? If it’s not the normal financial planning route?

Mariette Tappan
If I could say, well, this recent, a recent example of a crime that went through, you know, transition in terms of, you know, love for passing away? I think they all, you know, come to the appointment with the feeling of empathy and a feeling of, you know, I’m really very sorry about what happened to you. But how can I help you next. So I think the, how I take my clients through process is really just to be there for them, and to listen, and to let them tell them the story. And also to monitor you know, in what state are they because they could be really in a state of lameness live in a state of fractured mindedness. And, you know, you want to make sure that the client is actually calm, and that is part of the, the most important work that we do is to, you know, to really hold the clients heart, at heart. And I’d listened to them and make them feel safe in our conversation. And then sometimes I would not even continue with the conversation or, you know, in terms of taking it further, but using myth, you know, methods to naming and framing, you know, to maybe address difficult things, difficult matters, that needs to take place, like for instance, a policy that needs to be or form that needs to be completed, I would take them through a very short process of now soon and later, which really calms them down. And, you know, minimize the overwhelm that they might might feel, and then just hold their hand and be there for them, I would go back to the way that we agreed, we will acute, the you know, communicate when we need. So these are all, you know, depends very much on the client away, there are aspects, I think the importance is to get the client to be fully present. And to get the cognitive thinking back to be it’s supposed to be.

Louis van der Merwe
So even though you might be listening quite a lot in this meeting, and you might be quiet. underneath the surface, there’s a lot going on, you’re monitoring for that person state you’re listening for the things that they might not be saying you’re looking for the things that they’re avoiding, how’s the transition is the institute help you to frame this and bring structure to that?

Mariette Tappan
Well, the first thing is that most financial planners and you know, there’s some research being done on that talks too much. So I think the skill to keep quiet and really listen with the deep listening skills that, you know, that I’ve acquired, is something that that has helped a lot because you listen to the things which is not set. And mostly sometimes the client doesn’t even know that, that you know, some underlying other, you know, things that keeps them up at night. They don’t sometimes think about it. So you have to you really have to give them the time to, you know, through questioning, to let them also you know, think about those things that that is really bothering bothering them. And while I think we do active listening as financial planners, mostly the deep listening skills, by by having these awkward quiet moments, really gives the client time to also think about what what we’re talking about and some valuable information, you know, comes out in that process, because that actually gives you an anchor as to how you then solve for the, you know, the, the issues that you hear. And sometimes as I say, while having this conversation, the client actually discovers some of the things which they you know, would not normally think about, but it comes to the surface it’s there but you know by verbalizing certain things, on same level we therapist in that sense so by but you know, when you talk about things and when you voice them, it becomes clear you get a certain amount of clarity about her feelings or you know what you’re going to do. So I think that has helped. And you just recently that completed your training would know that, that part of the exam where you are part of a deep listening process is daunting. Because I mean, even myself, and you know, when you have these deeper conversations with clients are the things can become uncomfortable. But I am a strong believer that if you do not get to the bottom line of why a person is making certain decisions, then how can you get the advice to stick like Moira summers talks about in his book. And I think it’s mostly to do with the fact that we, we we assume sometimes, or we don’t get to the real bottom line of reasoning to be, it could be many things,

Louis van der Merwe
Married for advisors that might be struggling to keep quiet? What are the tips that you can maybe share with him to start the process of engaging or listening at a deeper level?

Mariette Tappan
Yeah, I think it is just to keep to keep quiet. And to all those, you know, those quiet, quiet moments, and, you know, take a deep breath, you know, breathing is a very good technique. And I think, to be practicing mindfulness, before you go into a meeting with a client, to make sure that you are absolutely tuned into the meeting the client, to check in with yourself, you know, how are you feeling? You know, in what’s face, are you because sometimes, you know, we could have had a difficult conversation before we meet with a client, or we could just have a bad day. So I think, you know, just do to really check in with, you know, how do you, you know, Are you Are you fully present? And, you know, are you 100%, focused on the client, and then having to ask the right questions, and be very curious about the client’s situation, will will help you resolve me, and then to, you know, to really be empathetic, I mean, one’s body language, you’ve got to check in and see, what is the client, like, and even if we use Zoom, now, I don’t think that one, you know, one can still be very aware of the client’s body language and the current state of mind, really neat.

Louis van der Merwe
I love how you started off saying, Just do it. But then actually, there’s these, these are real practical things. And it reminds me of advisors, and you know, people in general that are suffering from burnout, we’re not creating enough space, we’re not practicing enough self care, what are the things that Mariette does to you know, to practice self care that you can maybe share with us as a guideline for other financial advisors?

Mariette Tappan
Well, I think about what has helped me a lot is, you know, to do mindful practice, you know, on a regular basis, and, you know, the self care that we that we can do is we need to sleep, everybody will tell you that you need to sleep, you need to eat well, you need to do your exercises, you need to breathe, meditation is a great, great way to, you know, to be forcing yourself into a space of calm. And I walk a lot, I love the outdoors. So, you know, just by taking a mindful walk for 20 minutes, we feel it’s just a matter of on a daily basis, but actually taking more regular breaks during the day, especially if you have a very, very unloaded day, I think no one is going to realize that our bandwidth with this COVID And with dealing with a lot of uncertainty and changes and challenges, as really had an impact on one. And I can say very, very honestly, that, you know, yeah, these these days where my my bandwidth is just absolutely depleted. So that’s, that’s what I that’s what I do. I’m a spiritual person. So you know, those are things that that helps me a lot to, to also, gratefulness is a huge thing. You know, I think one has got to wake up in the morning and even during the day, just find something to really be grateful for. And then to reflect. And I think we tend to just, you know, take the one day off to the other day off to the other day. And I think they need to stand so and ask ourselves like, I’ve also worked with Well, me today, what didn’t go so well? What am I going to do tomorrow to make a data and I think the tiny habits that one gets to adopt is what makes you different, and there’s some good habits and bad habit. So I think to, to actually, just be aware of the things that that is not liking you, the base you that you can be, and to take the time to, you know, to do a little bit of inner research will make you a bit of evil. It you know, I think that I would just rock Iraq with it as a better person for my client, instead of being tired and frustrated. And actually. So that’s, I think one has got to watch yourself.

Louis van der Merwe
Yeah, it’s this foundation of almost wellness and flourishing, so that you can become a better person, but then at the same time, a better financial advisor or financial planner, for your client,

Mariette Tappan
in, in our industry or in finance, we have to remember that this is just one of many parts that will make you flourish in terms of your well being. And a lot is being saved in nowadays also, you know, about financial wellness and well being, and there’s a difference between the two. So I think, as I talked to my clients, certainly about the wheel of life, and about all the other aspects of the loss, because the one impacts the other. So unfortunately, or fortunately, for us, that is in the industry, that one of the biggest aspects that impacts on one’s life is money. So I think what we do for our clients, is exceptionally important. And, you know, coming back to the, to the, to the human side of, of financial planning, and how we can better impact the financial decisions that clients make. And even having the conversations about value, which a lot of people steer away from

Louis van der Merwe
buried, how do we keep our boundaries, when it comes to client, you know, a lot of this work, it feels like the client can become really dependable, or dependent on us, as financial advisors to make decisions on their behalf to do things, you know, and sometimes we could cross those boundaries, tell us a little bit how you have managed to, you know, control the boundaries?

Mariette Tappan
Well, I think the protocol that I’ve learned from the institute’s by, you know, calming the blind, down and secondary, giving the client an overview, a good overview, after they’ve gone down and sat down with him. And then just start with the planning process, when they are ready, is actually to give the work back to them, you know, they, they need to go and do certain things they need to go and think about the plan. So there’s a few things that I think one normally did for the client, and you want to really be the, you know, everything for your client. But I think the importance to it to make the client part of the planning process and giving them the responsibility about their own money, is what, you know, what, what will definitely create those boundaries, because, you know, I think I’ve, in some times, thought to myself, you know, I think I do care more for my client for this particular client that they gave themselves. And I think we feel that way, because, you know, we are passionate about what you do. And we can see that there’s a problem, every time we get to the client, you know, the situation is just the same, or it’s a dairy rated. And, you know, we want to solve for that again, and we want to actually go out of what we are actually supposed to be doing, that it brings me back to the previous conversation that or the previous call that we spoke about. And that is that you’ve got to know what what you know, you’ve got to position yourself well with a client, why do I do? And what do you do? And what is expected of, you know, of both of us because we are in a relationship. It’s not just a one sided thing. Yeah. So I think those conversations with advice, if you’re doing important, you know, upfront and after concluding a particular good change of life situation is, you know, this is what happened, you know, this is what we were going to do next. And that is what you need to do next and keep the cup of the client accountable, but also obviously yourself accountable. That, so yeah, I think we must, you must do less. We just give advice, but the gardener’s do also, the climbers do more.

Louis van der Merwe
I think a lot of this comes with experience, it comes with knowing, okay, what are the proper boundaries? What is my role as an advisor? What am I doing? What am I not doing? Because at the beginning of my career, I mean, I certainly felt like I want to do as much as possible, because I don’t want to have a client. Say no, you know, and just getting comfortable knowing what it is that I need to spend my time on, has really been valid. But for me,

Mariette Tappan
I think it comes down to that first appointment or that conversation, we really get to know the client. And, you know, the three questions that that, that we, you know, that helps us in that conversation is, you know, what do you want to protect most of if you’ve had, if you have the conversation about knowing what the client wants to protect, you know, you can also bolt into their conversation. And then you then know what is what is what what is important for the client. So, if you then talking about the boundaries, it is easy to refer back to what is most important and what you want to protect most. So you can quickly you know, enforce those boundaries, because you know, what is important? And then the next question would be, what do you need to let go off? So, by asking that question, you then, once again, it’s a boundary question, you know, if you get to that, according to what doesn’t serve you anymore, when you went through this transition? And what is what did you What did you leave, it might be leaving a house, it must be letting go of a of relationship or letting go of whatever it is. But it keeps the conversation and the boundaries intact with what is important to the client? And, you know, then the third question would be, what do you want to create more? And what do you need to create a new? So once again, if you if you know, those the answer to those questions, and you’ve gone through a very good conversation with your client, and say, hey, you know, that this wasn’t what you told me you were going to do or implement? And it is the not, you know, it’s not a sort of like a, you’re not a judge, that you are within, in this process,

Louis van der Merwe
almost support, and not just the accountability partner, someone that’s going to help you and guide you through that

Mariette Tappan
process? Oh, yeah. Because how do you? How do you get to where you want to be, is always certain things that you need to put in place, and there’s a price to pay for everything. You need to be having these conversations? Because otherwise, how do you keep the boundaries,

Louis van der Merwe
this type of work, must take up a lot of time and a lot of energy. And like we said, you need to prepare for it. You can’t just, you know, show up? How do we balance serving a client base? But yet also do this work and be available for clients when they need us?

Mariette Tappan
That is a difficult question. Because I think, depending on the type of personality and personality, we all different, as I said in the beginning, but I think that the type of work that we do, and a lot of things said about financial coaching, and you know, financial therapists and these all sorts of names that is creeping up, you know, creeping up, and that speaks to the time and effort that you’ve put in, that needs to be remunerated in a different type of way. So I think the the combination of consultancy fees, and assets under management is a way to monitor that. Because there’s no other way our time is, is valuable. And the difference that we make is not tangible. So I think, is also a lot to say about education. And, you know, for the you know, to illustrate the value, that the type of work that we do, in addition to just making sure that the figures and the planning is correct, and is valued. And people who prefer to paper, but I think it’s still thing that is so not under percent we, I think the industry is so I certainly will try and make this one of my submissions, but the communication about the value at the end of the day for helping clients making better decisions, and it is a different way of doing things. And I think there’s a huge value to that, because clients stick to the financial planning, in difficult times in ups and downs. And you can’t measure that with money.

Louis van der Merwe
That’s so true. I mean, a lot has been said about the value of advice, but we tend to measure it in basis points and we tend to measure it and investment performance yet. That’s only one piece of financial planning and even a very small piece of someone’s maybe life plan or transition plan. What do you see as the main value of advice?

Mariette Tappan
Well, let’s take an example of wanting to buy a car, everybody, a lot of young of my young clients, you know They get the first paycheck, they want to buy a car, or they you know, it’s buying a house or it’s a it’s a financial commitment. The question then is DeMarco and I walk into the first, you know, first car dealer and buy the smartest best score, or do I have a conversation with, you know, somebody that has recently bought a car or car dealer, principal that that is really knowledgeable about the type of car that you buy. At the end of the day, if I just went into buying my car with my whims and rolls, not really finding out the fuel consumption, the premiums in terms of insurance that I’m gonna have to pay the fact that the parts are very expensive. At the end of the day, that would be it, I could have made a better decision by having a conversation with somebody that is knowledgeable, that can show these blind spots to me, which I you know, haven’t even thought about. And in that process helped me maybe buy a different car that serves me better with my new, a better fuel consumption and a better resale value. So I think financial advice is no different. And that is our set. You know, there’s a lot of things that we don’t think about. But when you do speak to an advisor, who is knowledgeable, who has these conversations, finding out what’s important to you can steer you in a direction which like, which will make a difference and can save you money often get you to a place faster than maybe you would have done it in your own

Louis van der Merwe
love of you how you phrase that barrier. It’s not just about making a decision that’s making a decision that serves you based one that’s in your best interest, even though, you know, you might still be the one making the decision. You have the support, you have the knowledge you have someone shining a light on the blind spots.

Mariette Tappan
Yeah, I think it’s really about the blind spots. And I think, being authentic about what you know, and what you don’t know. And then also feeling that feel feeling safe, you know, with an advisor or with somebody that is knowledgeable. You know, without feeling our role, I don’t know anything about this. I might be scared to ask a silly question. And the terminology that we use in financial planning is in any case, so, so confusing, you know, so how do you? How do you actually make it easy for the client to understand, you know, what the value of this particular decision or this advice that you’re giving them, would have for them on the longer term? I think that’s also important that, you know, the understanding that we you know, that we that we speak on a level, and we give advice, so that, for that particular client, who is maybe not so difficult or not so knowledgeable, is meaningful, understandable and educational,

Louis van der Merwe
I would add digestible to that.

Mariette Tappan
Yes, as well.

Louis van der Merwe
So Maria, you recently moved to advice works after a very long time, with liberty life, tell us about the decision making and the thought process getting to that point, if you don’t mind sharing that,

Mariette Tappan
I think I’m the answer to that is that I’m a person with that is constantly wanting to reinvent myself, I want to stay relevant, I want to be better for my clients, I think with technology and the change in the industry, it is becoming in my mind more important to to be able to give advice from an independent point of view. And I had a wonderful career with Liberty life. But, you know, this the becomes a point that one has got to make a decision, what do you want? And how do you see the industry going forward for the next 1015 years, that you know that I can do this work as, as a as an advisor as a as a transition as planner and enjoy my work, you know, because after so many years in the industry, I don’t want to use articles with you become a long time. So I think one should not be scared to change and to move, but the main reason for me to move was to offer my clients you know a bit of a bigger variety of offerings to be seen as independent and objective and to be able to incorporate, you know, technology in such a way that you know, the I can spend more time with my clients, I wanted to free myself up to do the things that we I think we as advisors get to do, as you know the least. And that is to spend time with our clients, because we took busy with all the administration and compliance that goes with it. So the support and the technology, the teamwork. And, yeah, the offering was, was really theory was talking to my values and to what I want to offer my clients going forward.

Louis van der Merwe
I think that’s so true. I mean, we can spend so much time working on the business, that we don’t work in the business, we don’t get to serve our clients, what has been the most surprising thing that happened through this process,

Mariette Tappan
and really, the fact that I have bought so many amazing, you know, amazing relationships with clients has made my process, you know, go much faster and smoother. Because, you know, it is the the time and the effort, the trust relationships, that that one goals, that will stay in your practice going forward. Because things change, and you know, people make mistakes, things go wrong. But if you are, if you are, if you walk your talk, and if you’re there for clients in bad times, and in good times, and you make these, these huge decisions, which has taken you a lot of time to find a good fit, and to be able to leave behind what I was used to, was a major decision. But I’m so thankful for my clients and the relationships that I have within that, that has, that has made this process much easier. I’ve also learned that going through transition is very difficult. So you know, it’s one thing to be able to help a client’s hand when they go through transition, but this time, this was myself going through this transition, and one realize these, these, these things, that that can go wrong, you know, and you know, I my mind become fractured, I was numb at some point in time. And then by actually practicing what you preach, within your own changing scenario was for me very meaningful. And it gave me a lot of new understanding and compassion for other clients that is going to transition. So it was, it was I said to myself, well, you know, I never thought that I was going to study to become a certified financial transition list. But now a practicing on myself, I think the other to help us out data.

Louis van der Merwe
What a wonderful way to upskill and kind of just taste test the knowledge, I don’t think it’s ever an easy thing for clients to go through. And just having that awareness of what you’re going through and knowing, you know, when to make decisions and when not to make decisions, I think probably was a very critical piece.

Mariette Tappan
I think in life, we, we must be very careful to not, you know, to accept mediocrity, because if you accept it, you deserve it. And it’s on all levels of life, you know, I think one has got to be, there’s one thing I’ve learned in the COVID time in my life, and that is that, you know, there’s no time to waste and the brevity of life has taught me to do be more cognizant and aware of the things which is important to me, and to do lists of things which I which is really not serving you. And so I think, you know, to say that I want to play the piano or I want to go overseas or I want to do this, just do it, you know, because tomorrow might be too late. And to live in the Now Is is something which I have found to be very valuable, because there was you know, if I have to think about tomorrow, and all the things that needs to be done, I would you know, they would I would I would sit and maybe not do it because it’s really overwhelming. And so, hope that answers your question.

Louis van der Merwe
It does and it’s it’s wonderful to hear how you’ve made this your own, you know, and how you’ve said it’s actually helped you craft your life and what’s important to you. Surely this can’t be all the financial services industry. What What role does your family and friends help to play to develop this?

Mariette Tappan
You’re talking specifically this transition from you know, after seven years, well in life, it is not watching Oh, but who you know and who you surround yourself with that and who supports you. So, my my family, my children were very supportive of what I did and my clients were very understanding and excited excited me as Matter of fact, you know, everybody that I spoke to, but, you know, once again, if you have a authentic good relationship with your clients over years, and that’s where I think, trust comes in, you know, I, I talked to them about my ambitions, my vision, you know, how important certain things Oh, for me, I and the values that I have and the, our life to be in nature. And, you know, I think that one must focus on living really a life that you can, that you leave a legacy versus, you know, what, what the people say, on, you know, when, on your funeral. So, these things have always been important to me. So I’m not a, you know, other sort of philosophical person that I’m a deep person. And so yes, my clients supported me and my family supported me, and my friends supported me. But at the end of the day, is you need to go through it yourself. So the buck stops with you. But without that support, without supporting one’s life, in any event, I think, you know, one is not an island, and one needs to nurture the life, you know, the relationship you have with whoever you come across, you always say that when you leave a conversation, or when you meet a person, is always make them feel better than before they mate with you, or had a conversation or married.

Louis van der Merwe
That is certainly true of today’s conversation. And I want to wish you all the best of luck with this new chapter that you’re moving into. If someone wants to reach out to you to maybe talk about the transition is planning or just pick your brain, what’s the best place to reach out?

Mariette Tappan
Well, they can find me on my website, you know, which is Mariette. That’s your resume. All my details are on there. And some of the articles I write is on the or they can find me on LinkedIn. They can find me on what not that I’m so active on that that you can find me on LinkedIn and on my website. I think that’s the that’s the that’s the quickest way to find

Louis van der Merwe
Brilliant, thank you so much for your time today.

Mariette Tappan
Thank you so much doing it was great having this conversation